Decision Making - What is The Real Need ?

Last time, from Spencer Johnson’s book Yes or No, we learned that we need to use both our head and our heart to make the best decisions. We use our head by asking the first question: “Am I meeting the real need, informing myself of options and thinking it through?” We must answer either “yes” or “no” to the question. No “maybes.”

If the answer is “no” we keep going. We ask: “Is this something I merely want?” or “Is this something I really need?” We may want a Ferrari, but what we really need is a car to get to work. We have to make the decision based on the real need. We can go back and work on what we want later.

We need to focus on the results in such detail that we can actually see ourselves at the point where we have achieved them. This focus helps us say no to everything else until it is achieved. Once we have made this decision, the daily choices are easy. Does this action help me achieve my goal, my real need, or not? If the answer is no, then we don’t do it.

Spencer Johnson gives us a great way to separate the needs and wants: To see what we merely want, we ask “What do I wish I could do?” To see what we really need we ask “What would I like to have done?” looking back on it from the future.

Once we have done that, we need to be sure that we are looking at all the options. When we think we don’t have any options we need to remember that we just aren’t aware of them right now. We need to gather information, but only what is actually needed to make the decision. It is too easy to get buried in facts that don’t focus on the need. They just distract us. We need to gather information and then validate it for ourselves.

When we feel frozen with fear we need to just get started. Ask “If I don’t have the information, who does?” “What is the best way to get it?” “Have I verified it myself?” That will lead to more information and so on. Pretty soon we are able to see that there are choices we weren’t even aware of.

The last step in this part of the process is thinking it through. We can start by looking at our past decisions and learning from them. When we got bad results what had we done wrong in making the decision? When we got good results what had we done right in making the decision?

We can improve our future results by asking “then what? … then what? … then what?” for each of the options we are looking at. We often make the mistake of assuming that it is only a short-term decision, but quite often there are long-term repercussions. So carry each option out to the future.


Stay tuned for the next installment, Feelings.

Debby Riddick

http://DRiddick.bigmlmtruths.com

Making Better Decisions

For the next couple of weeks I want to share some thoughts from a book that has been a great help to me, Yes or No by Spencer Johnson. This is a book that teaches us a method for making consistently better decisions. Where we are in life is largely the result of decisions we have made, or not made. Johnson has discovered a pretty foolproof system for knowing how to "say ‘Yes’ to what works well for each of us and ‘No’ to what doesn’t.”

Our poor decisions cause problems in all areas of our lives – with our families, our finances, and our work. The act of putting off a decision because we are afraid of making a mistake is a decision in and of itself. We don’t have to make perfect decisions; we just need to make better decisions. A better decision is one where we feel better about how we made the decision and we get better results.

Most people have heard the axiom that the definition of insanity is continuing to do the same thing over and over and expecting different results. If we don’t know what to do, the first step is to stop what we are doing right now. We need to stop the behavior, based on the poor decision, which has become familiar and comfortable, even though it is not working for us, and create a void so that we can fill it with something better. As long as we are busy acting in the old way, the better way will not present itself.

So step one is to stop doing what we are currently doing and ask ourselves some questions. We need to make our initial decision in our normal way and then ask a cool head question and a warm heart question. Most of use one or the other, but better decisions are made when we take advantage of all the faculties we have. For example, use your logical mind to figure out what makes sense and then ask your heart how you feel about that; check in with some other folks in your Mastermind group; make the decision and act on it.

By using this system every time for every decision we will make better decisions overall. It doesn’t mean that we will never make a mistake, but it does mean that we will make more good decisions. As we perfect this process those decisions will get better and better.

Stay tuned for the next installment, The Real Need

Debby Riddick

http://DRiddick.bigmlmtruths.com

My top 15 books that have given me my philosophy on life

Since I posted my top 10 books about network marketing and saIes I thought I would give you my top 15 books that have had an influence on my philosophy.

Everything we read, listen to and watch has an influence on our life. I believe that Thoughts are Things. Choose carefully what you put into your mind.

I couldn't keep it to 10, so here are my top 15.

1. THE FOUR AGREEMENTS by Don Miguel Ruiz. A simple philosophy that can change our world if we let it.

2. SUCCESS THROUGH A POSITIVE MENTAL ATTITUDE by Napoleon Hill and W. Clement Stone. The first book I ever read about positive thinking and the power of our thoughts.

3. I DARE YOU by William Danforth. Originally published in 1942 and privately printed for his employees and friends, still relevant today. His American Youth Foundation is still distributing copies and challenging youth today.

4. THE CHOICE by Og Mandino. It's hard to choose only one of Og's books. Every one is great.

5. THE LOST CHOICE by Andy Andrews. Every choice we make counts and every choice has the power to change lives.

6. BEYOND POSITIVE THINKING by Dr.Robert Anthony. I read this book 3 times in 2005. It is a no nonsense formula for focusing our attention and thoughts.

7. REINVENTING YOURSELF by Steve Chandler. 100 ways to motivate yourself. Are you an owner or a victim? Find out.

8. THE DARK SIDE OF THE LIGHT CHASERS by Debbie Ford. Reclaim your power and your dreams.

9. THE HIDDEN MESSAGES IN WATER by Masaru Emoto. This made the invisible web that connects all things more amazing than ever to me.

10. THE POWER OF NOW by Eckhart Tolle. We all tend to live in the past and the future, but there is amazing power in being present in each moment.

11. THE SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE by Stephen R. Covey. A classic.

12. THE POWER OF ENCOURAGEMENT by Dr. David Jeremiah. Do you want to see massive changes in those around you? Then read this and discover exactly what the title says.

13. PASSIONATE PRESENCE by Catherine Ingram. It taught me the acceptance of my own inner knowing of spirituality.

14. THE FIVE THINGS WE CANNOT CHANGE by David Richo. We find happiness by embracing the 5 inevitable things in life: Everything changes and ends, Things do not always go according to plan, Life is not always fair, Pain is a part of life, and People are not loving and loyal all the time.

15. LEVERAGING THE UNIVERSE AND ENGAGING THE MAGIC by Mike Dooley. A kind of fun way to get the essence of a benevolent and loving universe.

Hope you find some of this interesting and helpful. They all had an influence on me.

Debby Riddick
http://DRiddick.bigmlmtruths.com

It's All About Teamwork

Have you ever heard the saying "It's all about teamwork"? I have. Usually in the context of a coach or boss trying to get me to do something that didn't feel very good. Something that felt like I was being taken advantage of. Something that seemed to work for the coach/boss, not for me. Here's the problem: It really IS about the team. Your team. Your family. Your network marketing group.

We need to stand by each other. We need to do what we can to help each other. In supporting each other we develop the kind of relationships that last through time and circumstances. When we are strong, when we have the time and resources to be there for someone else we need to do that. There will come a day in each of our lives when we will need someone to be there for us.

This is a great video which has been pieced together of folks all over the world singing song. It is from You Tube and is called: Playing For Change: Song Around the World "Stand By Me"

Stand By Me,

Debby Riddick

http://DRiddick.bigmlmsecrets.com

My Top 10 books on Sales and Network Marketing

One of my mentors asked us to send in a list of our top 10 books for sales and/or network marketing.  Here are mine:

1.  THE GREATEST SALESMAN IN THE WORLD by Og Mandino.  This was the first book I read that spoke to me about "thoughts are things" when I was in my 20's.  Actually anything by Og  is fantastic.

2.  THINK AND GROW RICH by Napoleon Hill.  I have studied this book twice before, but I never really studied it to the point that I "got it."  This time with my Mental Cleanse mastermind group it is really getting deeper.  Read this again and again.

3.  BEYOND POSITIVE THINKING by Dr. Robert Anthony.  This was the first book that gave me a framework for affirmations and mental practices.  This is worth really studying.

4.  THE FOUR SPIRITUAL LAWS by Don Miguel Ruiz.  This really gave me a look into my thinking and the basics of spirituality.

5.  THE FIELD by Lynne McTaggart.  I started to have some questions about the legitimacy of this whole "thinking" thing and I found this book which goes into the history of quantum mechanics and how our thinking affects our reality.

6.  THE GREATEST NETWORKER IN THE WORLD by John Milton Fogg.  After having been in and out of 5 or 6 MLM companies which used the old hard-sell methods I found a copy of this book and it dramatically changed my view of network marketing.

7.  SPIRITUAL ECONOMICS by Eric Butterworth.  A great book on money and spirituality.  It fixed by thinking on abundance.

8.  TWELVE PILLARS by Jim Rohn and Chris Widener.  A cute story that has a lot of good lessons.   I liked it so much I gave a copy to everyone I knew a couple of years ago.

9.  SUCCESS IN 10 STEPS by Michael Dlouhy.  This one changed my life and helped me to understand why I was not making it in the company I had given the last 5 years to.  It let me forgive myself for my failure there.

10.  THE 21 IRREFUTABLE LAWS OF LEADERSHIP by John Maxwell.  My favorite among quite a few great books by this author.   One of the best books I have found on the character of leadership.

Debby Riddck

http://DRiddick.bigmlmsecrets.com